1 day til the day the biggest fear of my life took place... the day u took a bit of me away and left to be with ur mum and dad and sister.. it hurts more today than yesturday and more tommorow than today cause wen u first left i had to deal with the hurt.. i couldnt say i missed u back then cause i hadnt long seen u... missing u came as time went on... the more and more days that passed where i couldnt see you feel u or hear u killed me inside.. i hate this tie of year as the 1 person i have seen every single year since a young child has been u nd for the last 3 years u havent been here i talk to u every day and i can hear u in y head anwsering me telling me to come on sort it out and get on with things.. cause ur always here and always with me... but it hurts cause all i want is ur arms around me every night i go to bed i await u coming into my room tucking me in and giving me a kiss, i remember before i left liam wass asleep in his moses basket and u crept in and kissed me on the head and whisperd im so proud of u nd i love u with all my heart and life... u thought i didnt kno u were there... i did, i just didnt open my eyes cause at that very moment u gave me strength to know that wen i oved out i could do it ! i could be a mum and i could look after myself.. nan ill never forget that and because i didnt let u kno i was awake it meant so much more to me.. i love u and my heart breaks writeing this cause i just want u, ive had a bad time over xmas. and i needed to her ur voice just to tell me everything will be ok, but i got thru it on my own and its quite lonely i struggle, but with every1 feeling the same i cant turn to anyone.. god nan i love you nd i miss you soooo much im gonna light a cande at 12 oclock tonite im gonna try and get a lantern this afternoon so if i can ill be sending it strait to you frm me nd liam, goodbye for now nan 1 day ill be in ur arms an ull be in mine and itl feel like we've never been apart <3 <3 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx